How do you process and respond better to negative and tough emotions? It’s not easy, but these tips can help.
This article was written by The Line Creative Hub member Binusha P.
Trying to tackle complex emotions can feel like taking the first bite of your least favourite meal.
At first, it may not be easy to digest.
Especially as we all hold different perspectives and experiences with how we express our emotions.
But the truth is, finding the right balance between healthy communication and self-awareness is the key to successfully working it all out and having stronger relationships with the people around you.
Let’s focus on the tough, but super common, everyday emotions of anger and jealousy.
What To Do If You feel Angry
Anger is one of the strongest emotions we experience, generally and especially in relationships, and it often feels overwhelming.
Sometimes it can feel like your anger is out of control, and sometimes it can be triggered by things that happen in your life.
The first step to working through this anger is to understand its root cause.
Ask yourself, ‘Why am I feeling angry?’
Try to understand what exactly it is that you’re feeling and what caused it.
Then ask, ‘What can I do to calm myself down?’
Try talking to someone you care about, or even a professional, to help you process these feelings.
And just know that no matter who you are, it’s okay to cry, and it can actually help you feel way better.
Read more about how crying can make you feel happier here.
It’s also incredibly important to remember that anger isn’t something you should take out on someone.
Instead, allow yourself to process these feelings and work on developing more self-awareness.
Get to know about what they mean to you and why you felt them, so that it can feel less overwhelming next time.
What To Do If You Feel Jealousy
It’s pretty normal to feel jealousy in any of your relationships.
Whether it’s seeing your partner hanging out with someone else or hearing your friends make plans without you.
A lot of the time, when you feel jealous, it comes from a place of insecurity or if you feel like you can’t trust somebody.
When that’s the case, you can start to develop some, tbh, unwarranted negative feelings and thoughts towards the other person.
Feeling those things can be pretty common, but they’re not something you should ignore.
More often than not, they can lead to bad decisions like interrogating someone you care about, and crashing out over what they’re doing and who they’re with.
Confronting them because of how you feel might seem like the only way you can get reassurance that what you’re feeling is legit.
But it’s almost always an unhealthy way of navigating your emotions, and can be completely unprompted, especially when it’s not something you’ve talked about with them before.
So how do you deal with feeling jealous? Clear communication.
If you feel it bubbling up, talk to them, say something like, ‘I know you haven’t really done anything to make me feel this way, but I feel jealous when this thing happens’.
You can let them know you’re feeling it without putting pressure on them to do anything about it.
It might sound boring, but actually just speaking with a partner or friend is truly the healthiest way to work through any jealous feelings you might have.
Take the time to talk through your jealousy, as well as being an active listener when hearing from your partner’s perspective.
You might find that your partner has felt similarly at times, and it will open a new space to be able to set boundaries and build trust between you for the future.
Finding a compromise through healthy communication that works for both of you is the best solution.
You can learn more about jealousy and how to handle it here.
Tackling your emotions is not easy
It’s important to remember that feeling angry, jealous or ‘too emotional’ doesn’t mean you’re weak, it just means you’re human.
You never have to be ashamed of how you feel.
Instead, try to be upfront and honest about your feelings and emotions with the people you trust and care about the most.
Opening up these conversations will help you better understand yourself and your emotions and help you have healthy and rewarding relationships in the future.
Think you might need some support for how you're feeling? Check out headspace.org.au or call 1800 650 890.
