The Line is for young people aged 14+ years.

Can a Cheater Change or Will They Cheat Again? What You Need To Ask

A person is taking a selfie with a smartphone. The phone screen visible in the image displays the selfie being taken.  To the left is sneaker-clad feet against a wall painted blue
Categories:

There are plenty of ways partners can hurt or betray one another, but finding out they’ve cheated might be the most painful.

If you and your partner have agreed to see one another exclusively, in a monogamous relationship, finding out they’ve secretly been intimate with someone else can be incredibly painful.

Maybe someone's cheated on you in the past, or maybe they’ve cheated on someone else.

Do Cheaters Ever Change?

Maybe you’ve cheated, or are thinking about cheating, and now you’re wondering if it’s built into your genetic makeup, and you’re just a faulty unit.

We’ve all heard those reasons and excuses for infidelity, even if they’re usually pretty lame.

Being drunk, not realising you were exclusive, or it being an accident, for example.

But nah, don’t even.

Sure, we all might be attracted to more than one person.

And yep, every relationship has low points.

But what makes someone think that the best course of action is to cheat on someone?

Why do people say they cheat?

  • Is it to get attention in the relationship?
  • Is it a lack of empathy?
  • Is it just putting their own needs above everyone else’s?

Lots of people make mistakes in their lives and relationships are almost always complicated.

But one thing that shouldn’t be complicated is being honest, with both yourself and with your partner.

If something’s not working in a relationship, then it needs to be talked about.

It might feel like it’s too hard or that feelings are going to get hurt, but few things hurt like being cheated on.

If someone has cheated on you, maybe you need to ask yourself if they’re respecting you the way you should be respected.

And maybe you should think about that when deciding if you want to stick around or get outta there.

What If You’ve Cheated or Are Thinking About It?

If you’re cheating, have cheated, or are thinking about cheating, then you need to ask who you want to be, and how you want to treat the person you’re in a relationship with.

If you do the maths and realise, "yep, I want to be a cheater", then do everybody a favour, including yourself, and get out of that relationship first.

If you have relationship questions, check out 1800RESPECT .

You may also like...

Categories:
  • Relationships
  • Creative Hub
Have you ever felt unsure about crossing someone's line, or them crossing yours? Setting boundaries can be hard. Sometimes, starting the conversation is even harder.
Real conversations: Let’s talk boundaries over pasta
A collage of two images on a photo of Earth from space. The collage images are of a man dressed as an astronaut while on a laptop, some cactus, and a young man reading a book.
Categories:
  • Relationships
So, they’ve asked for space. Not ghosted you. Not said it’s over. They just asked for some time to themselves, and suddenly, your brain started running laps.
How To Respect Someone’s Need For Space (Without Taking It Personally)
A collage of three images - hands holding, a clenched teeth emoji, two young people talking to each other while sitting on steps - on a dark starry sky background.
Categories:
  • Relationships
We all get it, feeling cared about feels good. It’s natural to want to feel supported and looked after in a relationship.
Is This Caring Or controlling? 5 Ways to Tell the Difference
A collage of four images, a young hetero couple walking hand in hand, two different wilting roses, and a young man with a The Line beanie on looking directly towards the camera.
Categories:
  • Relationships
We all know what respect in a relationship looks like, but sometimes disrespect isn’t quite as easy to spot.
When they cross the line: How to spot disrespect early
Loading next article